322. (v) The state of a marriage between a young man and a young woman is different from that between a young man and a widow.
By the state of a marriage is meant the manner in which husband and wife each live after their wedding, that is, when they are married; whether their living together then is an inward linking of souls and minds, which is the model way of living together, or only an outward one of dispositions, senses and bodies. The state of a young man's marriage with a maiden is the very beginning of a true marriage; for between them conjugial love can develop in its due sequence from the first warmth to the first fire; and then from the first seed with a young husband and from the flower of the wife's maidenhood, thus germinating, growing and bearing fruit, and introducing each other to these events. If this does not happen, the young man was not young, nor the maiden a maiden, except in outward form.
However, between a young man and a widow there is no similar initiation leading from the first stage to marriage, and no similar development in a marriage, since the widow is much more able to choose and be her own mistress than a maiden. A young man therefore takes a different view of endearing himself, if he marries a widow, from what he does if his wife is a maiden. But in these matters there is great variety and diversity, so here it is merely mentioned.