531. (6) Thus is conjugial love imputed to a person. There are marriages in which conjugial love is not apparent and yet exists, and there are marriages in which conjugial love appears to exist and yet does not. The reasons in both cases are many, recognizable in part from our discussions of truly conjugial love (nos. 57-73), of the reasons for cold states and separation (nos. 234-260), and of the reasons for apparent love and friendship in marriage (nos. 271-292). But appearances in outward manifestations determine nothing in regard to imputation. The only determining factor is the conjugial disposition that is lodged and harbored in a person's will, in whatever state of marriage the person lives. This conjugial disposition is like the tongue of a balance by which that love is weighed; for the conjugial union of one man with one wife is the precious jewel of human life and the repository of Christian religion, as we showed above in nos. 457, 458. This being the case, it is possible for conjugial love to exist in one partner and not at the same time in the other. It is possible as well for that love to lie so deeply hidden that the person himself has no awareness of it. And it may also be implanted during the course of one's life. The reason is that conjugial love in its progress accompanies religion; and because religion is the marriage of the Lord and the church, religion is what initiates and infuses that love. Consequently conjugial love is imputed to a person after death in accordance with his spiritual rational life. Moreover, for one to whom that love is imputed, a marriage is, after his passing, provided in heaven, whatever the character of any marriage he may have had in the world. From this now proceeds the following conclusion, that one ought not to take the appearances in marriages or the appearances in acts of licentiousness and infer from them of someone that he has conjugial love or not. Therefore, Judge not, that you be not condemned. (Matthew 7:1)
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