Conjugial Love (Acton) n. 321

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321. IV. THAT THOSE WHO HAVE LIVED TOGETHER IN LOVE TRULY CONJUGIAL DO NOT WISH TO MARRY AGAIN, UNLESS FOR REASONS APART FROM CONJUGIAL LOVE. That those who have lived in love truly conjugial do not wish to marry again after the death of their partner is due to the following causes: 1. Because they were united as to souls and thence as to minds, and this unition, being spiritual, is an actual adjunction of the soul and mind of the one to the soul and mind of the other, which can never be dissolved; that such is the nature of spiritual conjunction, has been shown here and there above. [2] 2. Because they were also united as to their bodies by the wife's reception of the propagations of her husband's soul, and thus by the insertion of his life into hers, whereby the virgin becomes a wife; and, on the other hand, by the husband's reception of the conjugial love of his wife, which disposes the interiors of his mind and at the same time the interiors and exteriors of his body into a state receptive of love and perceptive of wisdom--a state which changes him from a young man into a husband; respecting this, see above (no. 198). [3] 3. Because a sphere of love flows forth continually from the wife, and a sphere of understanding from the man, and this perfects the conjunctions; that this sphere with its pleasant outpouring surrounds them and unites them, may also be seen above (no. 223). [4] 4. Because partners thus united in marriage think and breathe what is eternal, and upon this idea is founded their eternal happiness; see above (no. 216). [5] 5. It is by reason of the above recited causes that they are no more two but one man, that is, one flesh. [6] 6. That such a one cannot be rended by the death of either partner is clearly manifest before the ocular sight of the spirit. [7] 7. To the above causes may be added this new fact, that these two are not separated by the death of the one, since the spirit of the deceased partner dwells continually with the spirit of the one not yet deceased, and this until the death of the latter, when they meet again and reunite and love each other more tenderly than before because in the spiritual world. From all this follows the irrefragable consequence, that those who have lived in love truly conjugial do not wish to marry again. If, after the death of the partner, they contract something like marriage, it is done for reasons apart from conjugial love, and these reasons are all external, such as: If there are small children in the house and provision must be made for the care of them; if the house is large and provided with servants of both sexes; if forensic occupations withdraw the mind from family affairs in the home; if mutual aid and services are necessities; and other like reasons.


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